Am I a Negro or an Indian

During my birthday dinner, Sharon (my ex) asked why I had an accent and did I have an identity crisis. Well I explained to Sharon that having an accent ensures that you get better treatment that to me is a proven fact as I have done countless experimented on such a thing. For the sense of identity did make me think? What have I become over the years. It’s true I’m no longer the ‘Indian’ I was but I have adopted to the cultures of the western (mostly African American /British Lingo).

I do shy away from Indian groups as I normally label them as troubled groups and I do not speak the language fluently. But this doesn’t mean I am not any Indian as the next. I still enjoy a good Indian movie, songs. I do have my favorite actors and actress. Does this make me Indian? The other side of me is so western it influences every aspect of my life, from the choice of clothes to what I eat everyday. If given the choice I rather have Western cuisine (not your fast food) then rice and curry every day.

My thought wondered who I really was, as being Indian also involves cultures something I have not neglected nor am I bother to follow such superficial stuff. I picked Lenny’s brain on this matter and he replied me this “u are a blady ass with a false sense security who like to think he isn’t an Indian but in actual life u are true blooded Indian who can do the street dance like any other poruki”. Which is true play me an Indian ‘dapang kuttu’ and my body will move to the beat?

Hmm... from here I look like an Indian I guess but there is a part of me that is suppressing this all. Which means Lenny is right I do have a false sense of security but why??? Is it that being labeled Indian is nothing but a 3rd grade race in Malaysia? I have many times come across people who look down on my race. Maybe we are our own identity, we make up what we want. Through knowledge and experiences we gather up that relates to us and apply to it. The older generations has already labeled who I am. What are Indians? I’m just saying I am Indian but a bit more.